Remembering 9-11
An awful day. An awful twenty years.
As we are about to observe the 20th Anniversary of 9-11, I hope recalling my experience of it does not seem self-centered and indulgent. I was nowhere near New York or Washington. I was not serving in the military or the FAA, nor was I a First Responder. Nor did I lose anyone I know personally. Thousands upon thousands were far more affected by that awful day than I.
But how important events affect those not closely involved in them is often overlooked or forgotten after a generation or two. We may remember what we were doing when x happened, but not those very young or not yet born. My mother told me she was working at Parkland Hospital in Dallas when President Kennedy and Governor Connelly were brought in on November 22nd, 1963, and she heard that Connelly was in bad shape. I’m glad she told me later as I was too young to remember anything of that day. So I think it does good for such experiences to be documented for those too young to know what such times were like for everyday people. That, too, is part of history. So I will proceed.
Part of my morning routine back then at my house near Pilot Point, Texas was to flip on CNBC. (If you wish, you may watch what I watched just after 5 minutes into this video.) Right away, the late Mark Haynes sounded bewildered as he commented on a plane hitting one of the World Trade Center towers. I wondered with him why a plane would hit such a prominent skyscraper in clear weather. Although my thoughts were with those in the floors above the crash, I was not alarmed. I did not think it was a terrorist attack. I don’t recall the possibility even occurring to me. Like most fallen humans, I was curious. Yes, I can be awful that way. Probably you can, too.
After a short time that did not seem short at the time, Mark Haynes and CNBC switched to a local New York news feed. Right as they did so there was an explosion. It was not clear what caused it. I thought it might be a secondary explosion on the same tower. Remember this was before HD TV was the norm. Most, not even most of the news people, noticed the jet approaching the Trade Center. Even in replay, one has to look for it.
But very soon, it was clear what was occurring. When they showed the replay, and I saw the second plane attack for myself, I began shaking. Apologies if I seem overdramatic, and I did not have an anxiety attack or the like, but I was shaking for a moment and sat down. I cannot recall any other event in my life having that effect on me.
After that, I could hardly take my eyes away from the coverage – from what may happen next. Yes, being horrified by an ongoing occurrence but being unable to pull away from it is another odd human trait.
When the first tower collapsed, it again took a while to figure out what had happened. There was so much obscuring smoke, and again remember this was not on HD. No, it did not at all occur to me before then that a tower might collapse.
I planned to drive to Denton that day. I was some time before I could pull myself away from the TV to do so.
In the days afterward, two memories stand out to me. One was the first time I heard a plane after 9-11. Remember that all planes were grounded on that day, and it was some time before non-military planes were permitted to fly again. My memory is fuzzy on how long though it seemed long. It was certainly long enough that the first plane I heard surprised and startled me. I did not have a panic attack or the like, but a quick moment of alertness bordering on fear as I looked up at the plane. For my last memory of planes before then was not good.
The second memory was how united and patriotic the country was afterward. Many had flags on their cars as I did on my pick-up. Approval of President Bush and of his tough stand against terrorism approached 90%. A few blamed America for the attacks, but they were few indeed and disdained. Whether that unity was justified or not, it is unimaginable that we could be that unified today only twenty years later. I think if a similar event happened now, we would not be nearly that unified. Such might even increase the incriminations among us.
As I said, I am recalling this to document, not to inspire. My experience is less important than what countless thousands went through. And, frankly, the state of the United States twenty years later is hardly inspirational. We are even worse about defending our borders, and we have worse people in charge of defending us. (And, no, I am not a fan of the Bush Administration although its success in stopping terrorist attacks afterward was remarkable.) The rest of us aren’t so great either. Comparing the twenty years after Pearl Harbor with the twenty years after 9-11 should make us ashamed. Yes, many acted heroically on 9-11 and in the days afterward – the firemen, the troops, those that stormed the cockpit on Flight 93, and more. But the rest of us in the years since?
Well, I probably should not get myself going on that subject. Not on this occasion.
I hope this has somehow assisted you in remembering 9-11 even if this is not very flag-waving. May God have mercy on the souls of those who perished and on those living who still bear the losses and the scars.